Ooops!

(Foot-In-Mouth Disease and Silly Mistakes)

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I became pregnant at age 19.  My then boyfriend immediately proposed and we planned a small wedding at my mother's home.  We sent out invitations for our wedding only 1 1/2 weeks before the wedding, so I knew my guests would probably know what was up and politely not mention it.  I was wrong!  My aunt 'Jo' came up to me after the ceremony and said,  "So, I guess you must be pregnant!"  I said I was, and she replied,  "Well, get a good divorce lawyer.  These things don't last."   She said that to me!  At my wedding!  I spent 10 minutes in the bathroom crying.

That was 26 years ago and my husband and I are still happily married.  Our daughter is a college graduate and married three years ago...still waiting for grandkids, though!  The last laugh is on you, Aunt Jo!

To all the women who have rude comments at their weddings...try not to let it bother you!  Once I controlled my tears I went out and ended up having a lot of fun at my wedding. Many who attended still talk about how much fun everyone had.

Ooops0212-04

This makes me laugh every time I think about it.  My boyfriend and I were asked by good friends to be MC's at their wedding.  We were excited but very nervous because we don't know their families very well.  Months pass and I run into the Bride while shopping, she tells me that we do not have to MC anymore because the Groom's Mother will be doing it.  Fine with me, I'm not very good at public speaking anyway.  So, the wedding is getting closer and we have not received an invite.  After all this talk about us being a part of their wedding and we didn't even get invited!  To this day I don't even know if she realizes how strange that was for us.

Ooops0220-04

 At our rehearsal dinner, we had our bridal party and also the three surviving grandmas who had traveled from out of town.  The three grandmas chose to sit together on the opposite end of the table from my husband and I.  We thought they would have some fun getting to know each other, but didn’t quite predict the effect the free wine might have on them.  

Before the end of the meal, they were loudly debating whether or not my fiancé and I were still virgins, bringing in our past histories (for example “He didn’t even date until college, well she’s dated quite a bit and one of those boys seemed a little wild . . .), the tragedy of modern morals, and whether we “looked” like we still were.  Keep in mind I was hearing bits and pieces of this on the other end of the table, there were our parents and the wedding party and their partners all along the table and nobody dared to tell the elder generation to be quiet, so it ended up being a story we look back on with laughter.

Ooops0304-04

  I was engaged in May 2003 to a great guy that I cared for very much.  At the time I was only 20, and our wedding would have taken place before I turned 22.  I say “would have” because we broke up in November 2003.  Although I was the one that instigated the break up, it was still an incredibly difficult and painful time, between the break up itself, unpicking wedding plans, and my family’s anger towards me.  All I wanted from people I told was an “I’m sorry” or “How are you doing.”  Instead, I got a whole lot of, “Well, that’s for the best,” which did nothing to make me feel better.  

Note to all readers: if someone tells you they have broken off their wedding, it can feel like a death to that person, and it does not help to say the situation is for the best.  It may be the truth, but it’s not what the person wants to hear.  The one thing that took the cake in my eyes, however, was what a business acquaintance said to me.  She’s very nice, and I’m sure that she didn’t mean to be so insensitive, but when I told her what happened she said to me, “I’m so glad you’re not getting married!  Thank goodness!”   I’m glad that she at least was relieved at my break up and that she thought she should share her delight with me!

Ooops0411-04

I work at an office supply store and a lady came in to return a fax machine.  She said she had received it as a wedding gift but had no use for a fax machine.  While she was shopping in the store, we noticed that the box seemed too light and had been retaped.  We opened it up in front of the customer and discovered that her gift had not been a fax machine, but a beautiful, hand-knit afghan.  The bride had not bothered to open the box!  I still wonder what she wrote on the thank you card.

Ooops0606-04

When my fiancé and I first got engaged, I brought my parents 25 year old wedding album over to his house to look at with him. He was laying down, feeling sick, so I just set it next to the bed to look at later. Some time goes by and he quickly sat up and goes "I'm going to be sick" and proceeded to vomit-right on top of my mom and dad's wedding album! It was awful, but looking back it's funny now. Thankfully, we were able to clean it up and although the album itself was ruined, none of the actual photos were.

Ooops0612-04